Category Archives: Motherhood


Some days, just being alive is hard.  We had a lovely night for the fourth, but because it gets dark late here, the fireworks aren’t on until 10 pm.  (Even then, it’s barely dark enough.)  Anyway, maybe it’s because of that, or maybe because H went hiking today and I also had some work obligations, I am just wrecked this evening and feeling positively lousy.

I’m only a few days away from halfway.  I’m getting through this one day at a time.  But the fatigue is really just overwhelming at times.  I spend a ridiculous amount of time resting – resting in bed, resting on the couch, resting wherever.  My kids think resting is my favorite hobby.  I had so many goals for today that are sitting undone because I barely, just barely, have the energy to type this.

Yup, whine.  Can’t wait til the baby is here and I have my energy back.  Of course, staying up all night with a newborn is not exactly known to energize your average mom.  I think I may be too old for this.  Was I this tired at 31 when I was pregnant with L?  I honestly don’t remember.


L had her first swim meet last night.  (She’d previously had a practice swim meet with her team only.)  The whole event went fine.  I’ve noticed in general, swimming doesn’t seem as big or as popular in Seattle as in SW Virginia, despite the much larger population.  Why?  Well, last night’s meet was a case in point.  It was in the 50s and drizzling on and off.  Seriously, folks.  Does weather in the 50s make you want to go swimming outdoors?  The pool is heated, so it’s not that big of a deal, but the kids spend a fair amount of time standing around shivering in their suits.  We’d brought a towel and sweats for L, but it was not enough.  She was frozen, and so were the rest of us by the time we got home.

Oh well.  Life in the Pacific NW has its ups and downs.  It’s definitely different!  We all woke up freezing this morning since we haven’t been running the heat and the temperature dropped below 50 last night.  We finally gave in and turned on the heat for a couple hours.


16.5 weeks and still nauseous.  I threw up yesterday, which is certainly about as late as I have ever thrown up during pregnancy.  I am just exhausted by it.  Surely this will end, right?  I dared drink about a third of a coke this evening, and I think that’s why I’m feeling particularly lousy right now.  Sugar just does not agree with me lately, and I was in Spokane on business the last couple days, and ate a lot of fried and sugary food and am now paying the price.  It was hard.  So. Hard.  Traveling for work while feeling like this.

I’m feeling the baby.  It’s nice.  Definitely the best part of pregnancy.  Though B patting my tummy is also very cute.  Sometimes she gets confused about where the baby is . . . my breasts?  Upper belly?  But I think she’s got it down now.  She’s so excited about being a big sister.  L is decidedly less enthused but seems neutral more than sad, so I’ll take it.  I think she’s kind of excited but also knows that little siblings are a mixed bag.  Even though B is unquestionably one of the best things in L’s life.  L loves her so much even if she gets annoyed.

I was trying to think if I had any other friends that “voluntarily” had three kids.  I have male friends from work with three, but I’m getting stuck thinking of women.  Pretty much all of my close women friends have stopped at two.  Obviously, I have acquaintances who’ve had three.  But close friends?  No.

pregnancy announcements

Something about pregnancy announcements featuring couples canoodling each other gets to me.  I mean, it’s like, we understand that you are having sex and that you are hot for each other and that the magic of man and woman created new life.  I don’t feel this way about wedding announcements or engagements at all – it’s specifically the pregnancy announcements.  I don’t know what it is, but a lot of them are just so ick.  I think there’s something to be said for the old-style thing where you weren’t allowed to acknowledge that a woman is pregnant.  In fairness, that’s the approach many of my co-workers have taken.  I am also very ambivalent about photographing pregnancy tests.  I mean, that thing has your urine on it.  Gross!

Baby and I are 15 weeks along.  It actually surprised me to read that the little one is 2.5 ounces.  That’s not nothing.  The fruit comparisons are another thing that bug me, but this week’s comparison is to a navel orange.  Navel oranges weigh a heck of a lot more than 2.5 ounces.  I think the low density of fetuses at this stage is interesting.

I, meanwhile, am putting on weight like it’s my job.  I am hungry all. the. time.  Also still nauseous sometimes and doing more than my share of gagging and retching, but overall feeling better.  Sadly, I sat next to someone with a case of the bubonic plague at L’s dance recital, and I’m pretty sure I’m coming down with it.  I mean, I’m definitely coming down with something, but whether it’s the apparently life-threatening illness she had is TBD.  In hindsight, I think I should have asked for another seat.  Being sick while pregnant is just not cool.

swim swim swim

B: I don’t like it when you leave me home alone.

Me / H: When did we ever leave you alone?

B: When Daddy is working and Mommy is resting and L is having privacy.

Me / H: (laughing at the cuteness of her turn of phrase) You don’t like it L is having privacy?

B: It’s not fair when some people are having privacy and other people are bored.

Me / H: Don’t worry, when the new baby is here, you’ll always have some to play with.


L had her first swim team practice yesterday.  Pro tip: In Washington, swimming pools, even outdoor ones, are always heated!  The pool is actually quite balmy, even though it’s still in the 40s at night.  I was quite pleased with the revelation.  Anyway, I’m quite proud of L.  She did great.

H attended the swim team parents’ meeting tonight  (I’m still only marginally functional due to morning sickness, so he’s been basically single parenting the last seven weeks.)  He was intimidated by how serious it was.  “Everyone was like – swim, swim swim, my kid has been swimming for years, swim, swim, swim, everyone so obsessed with swimming.”  What else would you expect at a swim team meeting?  But I’m amused.

I think swimming is a great life skill, and I think after a couple summers of swim team, you’re a swimmer for life.  You’ll always be confident in the water, even if you never swim competitively again.

a new addition

I’m 12 weeks, 5 days pregnant.  Due date, 11/26.  H and I decided to get on the merry-go-round one more time, and so we’ll be a family of five, with a third little girl joining us.

The first trimester has been its usual misery.  Perhaps it’s easier when you know what you’re in for, but mainly it hasn’t been as severe this time as in past.  Constant nausea, but no vomiting.  I often feel OK for an hour or two in the morning, which gives me much needed mental relief.  My last pregnancy, the vomiting was sufficiently severe that I took meds like Phenargen and Bonjesta during the day, both of which have fatigue as a side effect, which left me feeling like a miserable zombie.  This time, the evenings have been brutal, the days hard, but the mornings are better.  I’ve even been able to run in the mornings, albeit slowly for short distances, which has helped my mental state enormously.

It’s obviously been hard having this line up with taking a new job.  I could have delayed switching jobs, or I could have delayed trying to get pregnant.  But really, there’s never a good time.  I’ve been working 30 to 35 hours a week, and hopefully I’ll feel better soon and be able to get up to 40 hours.

falling in love

I was watching The Bachelor on my computer.  (Some seasons are free with Amazon Prime.  Who knew?

B: What are you watching?

Me: Oh, just some people talking about falling in love

B: When me and L grow up, I hope we can fall in love with you.

Me: I’m already in love with you.  Do you think we should get married?

B: You can’t.  You’re already married to Daddy!

Cute.  Obviously they’re still a little hazy on the nitty-gritty of falling in love.  But they’ve figured out polygamy is not OK!